Mom's Release

The trials and tribulations of a mom of four great kids!

Happy with what we have…

on July 11, 2011

The decision to not have any more children has been a difficult one for me.  We have four wonderful children now and really, they’re as close to perfect as one can hope for (without being totally unreasonable!), but I still found myself feeling like maybe, just maybe, we should do it again.  I will fully admit that as much as I loved being pregnant, having babies, nursing, etc, my hesitation to make the decision not to have more has a lot to do with me getting older (and not exactly wanting to!) and accepting that that phase of life is finished and the next one is starting. Also, as the kids get older, I sometimes feel a little less *needed*, in spite of the fact that I know that’s a natural progression and shows I’ve done a good job!

This summer, we headed out on our annual family drive to NH to visit friends, with whom we always spend the fourth of July.  They have a cottage on a lake, the kids water ski, wakeboard, swim, etc and they have a big celebration with family and friends, topped off by a huge fireworks display at dusk.  This year, there were several families with toddlers.  My husband and I watched (with our adult beverages!) as the moms and dads of these toddlers ran after them, making sure they weren’t eating/drinking what they shouldn’t be, not running off down the road, not drowning…etc.  At one point, just after dinner when we were sitting in comfy chairs, watching the sunset over the lake, we turned to each other and said how freaking happy we were that we were over that stage and didn’t have to chase after anyone anymore!

When we were going through it with our own kids, it really didn’t seem to be much of a big deal…you had little ones, you chased after and took care of them.  But now that we’re out of it and past that stage of life, we both realized how lucky we are and how very happy we are with the family we have.  I was pregnant for 32 months of my life (!), nursed for four and a half years of my life (something I truly loved), we pushed a stroller for 10 years, and bought diapers for so long I don’t even want to figure that one out.  As we went though it, we also went through the full range of emotions and as hard as it sometimes was, it was always worth it.  We’re two very lucky, very blessed people and I think that little family trip made us realize a little more, just how lucky.  For me, in spite of wanting to fight getting older, realized how important it is to count our many blessings and be thankful for what we have!

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