Mom's Release

The trials and tribulations of a mom of four great kids!

The Return (or Start) of Date Night

We have a super busy household.  That’s to be expected with 4 kids between the ages of 9 and 16 and a husband who owns his own business, but man!  Life is busy!

I’m constantly looking for ways to slow it down, try to enjoy it more and to feel less stressed all the time.  One thing we’ve realized is the importance of date nights. Regular ones.  With the insanity of life in our house, going out together, just the two of us, has fallen by the wayside.  We’re a very tight-knit family and we tend to be doing things with the kids most of the time.  Even when we’re going out for a bite or to a movie, there’s usually a child (or 2, or 3, or 4) tagging along with us and really, I love that.  I love that we still love to do things together.  But, that leaves very little time for just the two of us to hang out…without anyone wanting us to listen, asking us questions, arguing with each other (!).  My husband has been bugging me for a while now to start going out at least once a week, but I tend to feel guilty for doing something so regularly without the kids…I feel like we shouldn’t be spending money on things that don’t include the kids.  (How crazy is that?!)

Then came the perfect opportunity!  Our oldest is taking a swimming instructor course once a week, for 2 hours and it dawned on me that we could use that time to go out together…every week!  It was a set time, middle of the week, when  the 14yo is available to babysit and (shockingly!) no one has anything else on. YAY! Our first night was this week and we went to a coffee shop!  Ok, I know you’re thinking…”whoopie!  Fun couple they are!”, but really, it was perfect.  We sat in front of the fire of a very quiet cafe (it’s a hopping busy spot for businesses during the day, but nice and quiet at night), chatted about just about everything we could think of and even just sat quietly…but it was all without interruption and it was blissful!

photo (25) My husband and I are completely in love with each other…we don’t have any  issues with that.  We know we have each other to make sure we stay grounded  when one of us is going off the deep end (ususally me!) and knowing that made  me feel there was really little need to find time together outside the  house…there’d be plenty of time for that when they were all gone!  The other  thing we found was that when the kids were younger, arranging a sitter, getting  everyone settled before we went out and getting ready to go out in the middle  of all of that was just too much work to bother and we fell into the habit of just  not going.  But we’re way past that phase now (it flew by without us  noticing)…no need to arrange the sitter, or get everyone settled before we go.  He was right…we do need time just with each other, whether to talk about all things to do with the kids or about nothing at all.  And that little taste of two sweet hours alone together, without anyone else vying for conversation time, or needing anything from us, was sweet enough to make me more than happy to do it every week!  Now we just have to come up with other things to do besides just hitting the coffee shop!  Any ideas??

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